Posted by: The Sweet Life Runner | July 28, 2007

What If?…

Lately, I often found myself thinking about something whenever I am not preoccupied. I don’t know but I always kept on thinking about my “what ifs” in life. I know I had plenty of wrong decisions in life but I stood by it and I was responsible enough to correct those mistakes I have made from my past.

First, I thought about “What if I finished my studies before?” and I am thinking about what will happen. I see myself as a High School Teacher or a College Professor. It would be nice since my dream has come true. A week ago, we had a chat with our Algebra Professor. My classmates are so curious about his civil status if he’s married or not because they are so interested in him (they had crushed on him and I do like him too). By then I asked him how old he is and found out that I am one year older than him. It struck my inferiority complex right on the spot. That’s when I wished I finished my studies before.

Next is “What if I chose not to marry at an early age?” or “What if I chose another man before my husband?” or “What if I waited and marry at the right age?” or “What if I didn’t marry at all?” This is the thought that mostly lingers in my head. I have imagined another man with the characteristics that my husband doesn’t have. And I know that I will be happy with that man. Another is I married at the right age with the same man I loved. I think it would be great since we will be ready to face the responsibilities of having our own family. And lastly, If I didn’t marry at all, I guess I will be rich or even famous. That would be nice and I know it’ll make me happy. I see myself as a successful woman with my chosen career. It would be much happier since I will be single and will not have serious responsibilities in life. I can be as carefree as I could be.

These things just sinks in my head on after another. Which I know is a little disturbing for me.

Last night, a very good friend of mine and I had a conversation about this. He said this things are not good, its an unfinished work, which makes sense because I am a workaholic person. He also said that it may mean that I regret those things. In this statement, I greatly oppose him. I analyzed myself and I came to one conclusion. “I just want to see what will happen if I chose this thing over the other”.

He said that its not a good idea. Because if I could gaze that, and see that It’ll be better, I will have a deep regret over the one i chose. So he said, I should better be happy and make the most of what I have. Well, I guess he’s right.

The next thing I have to do is to control this “what ifs” from entering my head whenever I am not busy. He didn’t have any suggestions for this but I somewhat came up with a good idea. I should always be preoccupied to keep this unwanted things from my thoughts.

Well, don’t be misled. I love my husband more than myself and I never regret the day that my son came to our life. Its just that curiosity is my main enemy for now. As they say “Curiosity kills the Cat” and I don’t want to be the Cat so this things should be in a closed book from now on.

curious cat

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Responses

  1. hey! i was the person she was talking with on this blog?he,he. well said dude.life is always full of contradictions and paradox.we cannot say things will remain the same,a years from now.One of the most difficult part of life is choosing whats best.we can be the best judge but we cant always say that we can choose the best.that is because were living in a world full of influences and outside forces usually makes our preferences change.nevertheless we could sometimes end up with a wrong person or verdict.but whatever the decision or the person or outcome shoulis,we dnt have regrets.experiences would always add up for better,and even us as well.it will benefit alot making us a good fine genuine person.one technique,which is not so easy to do is learning how to handle and manipulate things we have.we should treasure the people who cares around us. learn to play with the situation and able to survive in every truble.nevertheless giving out the best out of us.im not saying im this kind of person but at least i have a firm standing in life im wanting. and let me say my point again,giving the best out of what we have! one more thing,life is always a miracle with God.situation might be a tragedy or suffering for us.however,just carry the faith and all will go well,if not now,in the near eternity.

  2. Because destiny is a matter of chance and choice.

    eyes2eyes.wordpress.com


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